The sky is clear and blue from this morning, making for a refreshing day.
Yesterday's gloomy mood was like a lie,
It's a beautiful sunny day.

About ten years ago,
My life was depressing and chaotic.

The room was not tidy, and lint had accumulated in the corners.
The laundry is always piled up in a heap.
I pulled it out from among them and wore it.
Direct mail is scattered everywhere,
Newspapers were piled up everywhere.
There was about a week's worth of dishes left in the sink.
It smelled so bad in the summer.

Even so, I still had to take the dog for a walk.

I didn't want to see anyone.
After it got dark, I put on a jacket over my pajamas.
I changed into jeans on the bottom and went outside.
There were days like that.

Because of the medication, I woke up in the evening.
That happened quite often.
Just knowing that I could sleep again at night by taking my medicine brought me peace of mind.
But the more I sleep, the further away morning becomes.

Only while you are asleep,
It was a time of solace, a time when I didn't have to think about anything.

Even on days like that, if I'm feeling good, I go out,
I had a great time meeting up with friends,
My memory is incomplete in places.
It's hazy and indistinct.

I wonder how I was living back then.

――

Even so, now, looking at the morning light,
I feel like it's sunny today.

That's all it was,
I am so grateful.

あの頃の私は、
よろめきながらただ生きていた。

合わせてこちらもどうぞ🌿
2026-03-24 It breaks, and then it begins again.